Sunday, January 15, 2012

Considering international or Russian adoption? Our advice

I took a look at the stats for this blog, and I see a fair few people accessing it through a Google search. It strikes me that it may be useful, now that we've gone through the process, to articulate some of the things we whink are important for people considering international adoption in general, and Russian adoption in particular.  From the top:

1. Consider why you're interested in international adoption rather than domestic adoption.  I get asked this on a fairly regular basis by people who are genuinely curious.  For us, the uncertainties of domestic adoption were the deciding factor.  Although you don't owe anyone else an answer to this question, you should weigh the advantages and disadvantages of both domestic and international adoption and decide which route is right for you. 

2. Once you decide on international adoption, you realize there is a WHOLE WORLD of children who need homes.  We received advice early on that made sense to us--go to a country that you always had an interest in.  Doing the giant stack of adoption paperwork for a country that you already care about makes the process easier.  Sometimes its hard to believe there is actually a child at the other end of the many meetings, appointments, signatures and the waiting-so it helps to have an upfront interest in the country where all the paperwork is headed.  

In the short term, remember that whatever country you choose, you're going to have to actually go there.  It's great to be excited to go see the country AND adopt a child, then come home with great memories and pictures for your child... and maybe go back for a visit later too!  In the long term (and more importantly), your child's heritage will be from this foreign country.  The culture, the food, the art, the language.  It's part of his or her life experience, and that's something you ought to be able to be enthusiastic about, not something that's a chore.